my sanctuary of thoughts... playing between the line of crazy and sane... where I reveal almost everything there is to know about me... where I surrender myself to the world...
I have got to revive this dying blog. I have made less than 10 posts for the whole year and most, if not all, of them are songs! It has lost any signs of human emotion when everything started to work well in my life. Three points come to mind:
1. I guess I am better in ranting out negative emotions than positive ones. 2. Maybe I just got so used to troubles that I don't know what to say when everything's smoothly sailing. 3. I like to keep things private now. Less complicated that way.
True True True. I can work on writing about positive emotion. I can get used to a worry-free, no-drama, uncomplicated blissful life. I can still keep things private by not telling too much information. I can definitely do this. What is better and more ironic way to start than a year-ender post. Now, that's something I always have much to say about! Watch out for it! ;P
All the colors of the rainbow All of voices of the wind Every dream that reaches out That reaches out to find where love begins Every word of every story Every star in every sky Every corner of creation lives to testify
For as long as I shall live I will testify to love I'll be a witness in the silences when words are not enough With every breath I take I will give thanks to God above For as long as I shall live I will testify to love
From the mountains to the valleys From the rivers to the sea Every hand that reaches out Every hand that reaches out to offer peace Every simple act of mercy Every step to kingdom come All the Hope in every heart will,speak what love has done
O-Oh Ohhh
For as long as I shall live I will testify to love I'll be a witness in the silences when words are not enough With every breath I take I will give thanks to God above For as long as I shall live I will testify to love
Colors of the rainbow Voices of the wind Heaven reaches out where love begins Word of every story Star in every sky All creation testify
Mountains to the valleys Rivers to the sea Heaven reaches out to offer peace Simple act of mercy Kingdom come Every heart will speak what love has done
Colors of the rainbow Voices of the wind Heaven reaches out where love begins Word of every story Star in every sky All creation testify
For as long as I shall live I will testify to love I'll be a witness in the silences when words are not enough With every breath I take I will give thanks to God above For as long as I shall live I will test------------------ify
For as long as I shall live I will testify to love I'll be a witness in the silences when words are not enough With every breath I take I will give thanks to God above For as long as I shall live I will testify to love
For as long as I shall live I will testify to love I'll be a witness in the silences when words are not enough With every breath I take I will give thanks to God above For as long as I shall live I will testify to love!
when you get used to having a cellphone... you get hooked... your day is not complete without it... when you eat a lot of rice... its hard to lessen your in-take... when you have this habit of watching movies in the office... its.. hard to not do it again...
i know you know where i am getting into...
you are my drug... you are my habit...
addiction.. inclination...
you have become so much a part of me that you can be my heart... if they take you away i'd die.. my lung... you can take my breath away... and you can feed me the air i breathe... my brain... might as well kill me than ask me to take you out of my head...
Last May 15th, I thought the universe conspired to prevent me from flying out of the country. Almost everything that could go wrong, did and at the worst time possible.
We were not able to get on the bus as we've planned because a group of people, all 30 of them, decided to take the same bus we're taking. The thing is, the day before, sweetie and I asked one of the "barkers" there if we have to reserve a ticket for the bus. We were told that we can just get tickets when we get there tomorrow. The bus arrived an hour late (12noon), we took a chance but we did not make it, the bus was full in a matter of minutes. We were told that another bus would come by soon. At this point, we did not want to take the chance. So we came up with plan B. We decided to ask tita jo and pia if they can drive us to the airport. This cost us double than what would plan A have cost (coz we have to gas up and pay the driver) but at least, we're comfy (plus sweetie was able to come with us too!). They arrived almost an hour after the second bus arrived due to Makati traffic. We almost wanted to curse ourselves for being impatient. Now we have to get to Clark in 3 hours or we'll miss the flight! But thank God for He made the roads clear at that time and we got to the airport in Clark in a record breaking one hour and a half (I don't know if that's normal, but it's record breaking for me and this is my blog so get over it). Just in time for our 4pm flight.
So we checked our bags, paid for the terminal fee, lined up for the immigration. But just when I thought my luck is starting to change for the better, it suddenly went from bad to worse. Immigration asked the usual questions, but one question got me dumbfounded... she asked, "Ano nangyari sa DOST mo?". Perplexed, I was only able to say, "huh?". She said I am on their watchlist and I cannot leave the country. Then it dawned on me, she's talking about my DOST scholarship. I got qualified in the scholarship examination way back in 2000 and a 5-year service under them is part of the contract. So is a course in bachelor of Science. The whole world knows I took a course in bachelor of Arts. My parents paid for my tuition fee with our own money. PLUS, I was already able to leave the country last year! Evidently, I did not avail of the scholarship grant (I wanted to, but I did not). The Immigration officer is your typical heartless totalitarian who almost always never lets anyone go past him and makes no consideration whatsoever. He is asking me to present a clearance form from DOST no matter how much I try to explain that it's been eight years and I've never heard anything from them since then. He insists. I asked him if there is a phone I could use, he says no. Imagine, an airport with no phone...but they have a fax machine. So I made do with what I have, I got DOST's number from the sample clearance letter the dictator showed me and called them through my low-battery cellphone. Thankfully, God was on my side that day and He sent me a miracle. I was able to ask a certain Dante from DOST to fax the clearance on a long-distance fax number in a truly miraculous and (yet another) record-breaking 30 minutes! When I had it in my hands, I almost want to slap it in his face. But that would be stooping down to his level and very unlady-like of me. I can see he was quite dismayed with the fact that I got what he asked for in such a short time given the circumstances. I gave him the you-just-got-served look while he was talking to me and I know it irritated him coz he resorted to talking to my mom about it even though I'm clearly not a kid anymore. Haha! At that point, I felt I've won the war. With God on your side, who can be against you, right? I got to Singapore as I had planned and He has planned. Watch out for the pix! ;P
Give up! Give up those hurts of the past. It's time to move on. satan loves to have you live in the past because that renders you ineffective to live in the present-in the now.
Tell Me, child. What is it that has happened to you? Who hurt you? What mistakes have you made that you regret? Did what happen to you change the fact that Jesus loves you, and He died on the cross for you so you could live in heaven with Him for all eternity?
Can anything or anyone ever change that fact? You know that nothing can ever nullify what Jesus did for you on the cross. If that's true, and it is, then nothing else matters, does it?
There is nothing that can happen to you, nothing anyone can do to you that can ever change the fact that My Son, Jesus, loves you and died on the cross for you so you gain heaven for all eternity. No one can ever take that away from you. No One!
Hold on to that thought. Put things in their proper perspective. When you do that, you'll see that being loved unconditionally, attaining salvation and the right to go to heaven is your ultimate goal. Everything else pales in comparison to that.
Even physical death cannot take heaven away from you, for then the real you-your spirit-just changes abodes. Physical death for Christians is moving from living in the temple of the Holy Spirit, your body, to living in heaven.
I know, My child, I know. Your mind is often filled with hurtful things that happen to you. Sometimes you even say to people "You don't know how much it hurt Me when such and such happened." Well, I ask you again, does what happen to you in the past change the fact that Jesus loves you and died for you, and now you can spend eternity with Him in heaven? I don't have to wait for your answer, because I know immediately your mind said, "No!"
Then, child, nothing else matters! Compared to eternity, all problems are nothing. Loving Me, being in My family, gaining the right to live in heaven for eternity-that' s what's important in life. If you lose that, you've lost it all. Don't hold grudges. forgive! Nothing you can gain on earth can make up for that loss, and nothing can happen to you on earth that can take that away from you- Nothing!
My freedom, my reason my savior that's what you are to me You free me, complete me my Savior that's what You are There's no other like You there's no one beside You You're more than my heart can contain I will love You all my life for You are my reason the One that I live for And I will love You all my life for You are my reason You're the one that I live for
this pain is more than I can bare i love you so, but fear is always there i can't stand up & fight for what i feel coz there's fear that interferes
i dont wanna let you go & set you free coz i know im the one you wanna be with but all i can say, this ain't right when i can no longer stand up & fight
we knew this day will come i cant say our love is gone coz we know deep in our hearts & soul, this love is worth fighting for
im sorry, this tears me into pieces that i am left with lots of wishes but before i go, i wanna tell you the truth i don't wanna love anybody else - but you
my heart jumped when you said that you love me my soul was at ease when you said that you cared my mind was totally at peace, when you held my hand but still something behind me tells something's bad it's been a long time since i heard the song of my heart a very long time since i know i'm in love but this is the first time I repel to admit that something inside me can never be perceived i want to say, "hey i love you too!" but i find it so hard to say it to you i don't know what's in me, to hurt myself or even cause you pain, though i know it's you well i guess i can't make my broken heart to accept love when it's still torn apart, so i guess, i have to say sorry this love's ain't meant to be
D A/D GM7 D GM7 A7 D A 1. Morning comes and I must go; day is breaking yonder.
Bm F#m GM7 D GM7 A7 D After all the places I have been, now Im going home.
D A/C# G D/F# Em A7 D I have been to seek the sky, to travel on the highway
D/C# Bm F#m GM7 F#m And the time has come, I dont know why
Em A D Im going home.
REF1:
D A/C# G/B A7 D A/C# G Where is the answer to so many questions
D/F# Em A I dont know, so I begin another journey
D A/C# G/A D7 Bm Bm/A D/F# Where is the meaning for my world
Em A D I see the answer now.
2. Though we came by diffrent roads, now we walk together. Stay besiode me all our days, strangers never more. Through the cool of summer rains, by the heartside fire Here Ill be with you when nothing remains I am home to stay.
REF2:
D A/C# G/B A7 D A/C# G Love is the answer to so many questions
D/F# Em A Now I know, and I can stop my endless wandring
D A/C# G/A D7 Bm Bm/A D/F# Love gives the meaning to my world
un baller. sn ka? daanan ko ngyn. chaka un pasalubong ko.
-last text message received on my now defunct number a few weeks ago... and it was enough to change that mobile number I've had for almost 9 years. By the way, a baller refers to a white "Jordan" baller ID from Nike... Don't know what or who I'm talking about? go figure...
Saturday, September 08, 2007
People have scars, in all sort of unexpected places, like secret roadmaps of their personal histories. Most of these wounds heal, leaving nothing but a scar. But some of them don't. Some wounds we carry with us everywhere and though the cut's long gone, the pain still lingers... - Grey's Anatomy
Yeah, simply put, I got another stitch... I guess I'm starting to be a stitch-junkie... ;P
First thing I observed in Malaysia was their endless stretch of expressways. From above, it looked just like a bunch of christmas lights neatly aligned to form overlapping squares. I would say that Malaysia has a huge land mass, considering that it took us a little over an hour to get to the capital city sans the traffic. They are far from being overpopulated as there's so much land to go around! Anyway, I was able to visit the capital city, Kuala Lumpur where the gleaming glass towers of the 21st century (Petronas Twin Towers) can be found. Unfortunately, I was not able to go up the tower because I was told that around that time (9am), tickets would have already been sold out. Well I guess I'll just have to go back another time then! So I walked off with my tail between my legs and headed to the next big thing, the Kuala Lumpur Tower, which is the fifth tallest tower in the world. This time, I did not pass up the chance to get to the observation deck, even if it cost me RM20. They hand out MP4 players that will serve as your tour guide as you go around the deck. I'd say it was worth it. It's great for tourists like me, who don't have enough time to go on actual tours. The rest of our stay, we dedicated to shopping (Quicksilvr and Roxy brands are cheaper there than here). Malaysia is much like the Philippines. Malay people look no different with Filipinos, except they dress differently because they mostly adapt Muslim clothing. Taxi drivers there don't actually use their meters, but most of them are pleasant (they warned us about snatchers). I wouldn't say the same for bus drivers though. Aside from the native Malay, you'd also see a lot of Chinese and Indian people there. I'd say I haven't seen much of Malaysia (since I've only been there a couple of days) so I would definitely consider revisiting it someday.
Destination: Singapore
It's hard not to fall in love with a place like Singapore. It was just like I always dreamt it to be. First thing I noticed about it (just like what most people said) was that the place looks so clean and organized. I don't believe I saw a single fly or cockroach there (believe it or not!). Their "Carinderias" are known as Hawker centers and the food there are cheap but really delectable. They taste so much like the food served in expensive chinese restaurants here. It's really good food. Even if you eat along the sidewalk, you won't be swarmed with flies. You don't need to worry about transportation because buses and trains abound the place. They are not as crowded and as slow as it is here. Plus the card that you use on the MRT is the same card you can use for the bus. You just tap it in and tap it out, so no need for "kundoktors". It's fun to figure out which bus or train to take to get to your destination (buses are number-coded according to routes while trains are color-coded). It's still fun even if you get lost (I did). I spent more time there than in Malaysia so I was able to go around Singapore river, Merlion Park, Anderson Bridge, Esplanade, Fullerton Hotel, Glutton's bay in one night. One whole day was dedicated to shopping at Bugis Street (cleaner version of Divisoria), Bugis Junction (a small shopping mall), and Sim Lim Square (where there are gadgets-and gizmos-a-plenty at low low prices!). The half of the next day was spent walking around and taking pictures at Sentosa and the other half was spent on shopping at Tampines and at Orchard Road. I really had a fantabulous (fantastic + fabulous) time in Singapore. I like it there, and I hope it likes me to be there too. Hahaha.
It was my grandest vacation so far... and I can hardly wait to take another one! I wish, hope and pray for money to rain down on me so that I can travel a lot lot lot!
"A good traveller has no fixed plan and is not intent on arriving." -Lao Tzu
The world is a book and those who do not travel read only a page. -St. Augustine
"The use of travelling is to regulate imagination by reality.. -Samuel Johnson
". . .travel is more than the seeing of sights; it is a change that goes on, deep and permanent, in the ideas of living." -Miriam Beard
"The first condition of understanding a foreign country is to smell it." -Rudyard Kipling
I like this quote best: A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance - Unknown
You may write me down in history With your bitter, twisted lies, You may trod me in the very dirt But still, like dust, I'll rise. Does my sassiness upset you? Why are you beset with gloom? 'Cause I walk like I've got oil wells Pumping in my living room. Just like moons and like suns, With the certainty of tides, Just like hopes springing high, Still I'll rise. Did you want to see me broken? Bowed head and lowered eyes? Shoulders falling down like teardrops. Weakened by my soulful cries. Does my haughtiness offend you? Don't you take it awful hard 'Cause I laugh like I've got gold mines Diggin' in my own back yard. You may shoot me with your words, You may cut me with your eyes, You may kill me with your hatefulness, But still, like air, I'll rise. Does my sexiness upset you? Does it come as a surprise That I dance like I've got diamonds At the meeting of my thighs? Out of the huts of history's shame Up from a past that's rooted in pain
>An angel who comforts me, takes care of me and makes sacrifices to be with me. >A protector who will keep me safe from any harm. >A gallant knight who will fight for me. >A prince charming who makes me feel like I'm the most beautiful princess he ever saw. >Someone who can understand me when I get complicated, moody and crazy, all at the same time. >Someone who loves, respects and accepts EVERYTHING about me. >Someone who truly knows how to love unconditionally and unselfishly. >Someone who lets me know his innermost feelings and have always been so honest about everything. >Someone loyal and wants to be with only me and no one else. >Someone who knows how to say "no" to temptation, a.k.a. other girls. >Someone who never makes a promise he couldn't keep. >Someone heaven-sent who will stand by me, no matter what happens. >Someone who'd probably be one in a million. >Someone who is worth spending my life with. >All of these rolled into one, a someone, I may have already met...
