A Fork in a Road

I did not hear mass today, but instead I went to a Christian Sunday church service because my brother's engagement was officially announced to his Victory Christian Fellowship family. It's really not very much different than celebrating the Eucharist in a Catholic church. Except for the stage where a band is playing (read: live worship), the priests there are called pastors and more than one of them gets to speak and share on stage, the sermon is much more effective and less sleep-inducing, think of it as more interactive than the usual sermon, the people seem to really know each other, and they're very warm.. well, i guess there IS much difference after all. I have been to a service a lot of times before, and honestly, I really enjoyed it. Whenever I attend one, it never fails to overwhelm me to the point that I am on the brink of tears. If only my family wasn't there, I could have really shed a tear or two. It just moves me in a way that the Eucharistic celebration could not achieve (but should). I really am confused with my religion and it has been going on for a while now. I seem to mix a little of both Christian and Catholic ways and create my own religion which is really not the right way to settle things. I can't decide whether I want to stay as a Catholic or be converted to a Christian. I just can't. But I think that I better make up my mind, because it really has been affecting my relationship with God. I just wish He'd give me the answer. I am totally confused.